ROOTED RENEGADE

Have you ever wondered what it really means to “switch the letters”? Here recently I have been working through some really hard stuff. Parts of my story that have been difficult to embrace, not because I can’t but because it shows me a side of myself that I have never had to show anyone else. A side of me that I knew existed, some knew existed, but those who have stuck by me through my healing didn’t have to see. They didn’t have to see the ugly side of me. The side that hurt so incredibly bad that God sent an army to save from the pit of hell. The side God redeemed. The person that was so frayed and broken, so not who God made her to be, that there was a darkness in her. Trauma bonding, addiction, trafficking, exploitation, peril, years worth of self loathing, depression, just so many different things.

A sea of grief and overwhelming sadness swept over me as I processed through those memories. How could God love someone so broken to leave the 99 and come chasing after me? The river of tears just flowed and flowed like a river. The Dead Sea was finally alive, just as God had planned it to be. He knew I needed to see something…humility. I needed to see a side of myself and accept her…just as she was. All of her brokenness. All of who she was…just as He accepted her when He, the Good Shepherd, came chasing the wayward sheep.

“Fear haunts and pain hates…pain strengthens and fear drives faith” – Lecrae

I lived in fear which haunted me. My pain made me hate my past. My bitterness of what had happened to me blocked me from the deepest, most intimate relationship with the Father I could possibly have. Now, I have to switch all that around and be DIFFERENT. I have to switch bitter to BETTER. I have to let my fear drive my FAITH. I have to let my pain STRENGTHEN me more than I am now so that my relationship with JESUS flourishes each and every day. Acceptance of who we used to be takes away the shame and guilt. It takes away the sting. It helps us own every single part of it. We can’t change it. So we own it. I have owned up to a lot of my life, but certain parts I was so scared to show anyone or tell anyone. I learned to slay so many giants, and I slayed them with great valor. But I kept some hidden so deep within, but God said no more. If I am to be victorious I must slay them ALL!

The things we were a part of during our darkest times in life, whether they were forced upon us, by choice, etc…does not make us less than. They do not make us any less a CHILD OF GOD when our Father redeems us. When He covers us in His Blood and we pray that prayer of Salvation. Slay those Giants! Get BETTER and switch those letters!

The hardest battles we fight are within ourselves….

Romans 12:2 “Be ye not conformed to the patterns of this world but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind”

Transform daily…you don’t have to be bound any longer! Be uncommon in a world of commonality!